Copywriting competition: Name the wall
Table of Contents
Copywriting competition is now closed and the winner is… Vanina!
Unless you’ve had your head buried in the sand for the last few weeks, you’ve probably heard about the wall, and we’re not talking Pink Floyd. The newsworthy story of the year is President Trump’s wall on the border with Mexico has actually been given the go-ahead. The response it’s caused in America has ranged from fear to furious, with protests rampant. He’s even managed to get the president of Mexico as hot as a Mexican jumping bean.
So before he builds a wall to almost equal his ego, we wanted to lighten the mood, get creative, and have a little fun with it. China has the Great Wall, Germany had the Berlin Wall – how should we name name the wall? Since we know you’re all top-notch writers, we know we’ll see your originality and creativity in our comments section and name the wall. Let’s give Americans something to smile about. Who knows, maybe the name will stick!
The prize
The best name will be awarded this Tshirt to let everyone know you named a monstrous, er, monumental piece of history.
How to enter
Type your entry in the comments box below. We accept up to 5 entries per person.
Deadline
We’ll be accepting entries until 17th February, so plenty of time to “build” your list!
The Wall Great. Again.
The Alamo (de)Fence
The Bean Machine
The Trumpty-Drumty Wall
Sorry, that should be Trumpty-Dumpty (from the nursery rhyme ‘Humpty-Dumpty sat on a wall etc’.)
The Heiling Wall
The Terminator.
The Wall of Shame
Charrier Barrier
The President Bannon Wall
The Irony Curtain
Waldin
The Great Divide
The Walled Off Astoria
The Great Barrier Grief
The Wall of Shame
TKO (Trump’s Keep Out)
MACDonald’s (Make America Caucasian) Franchise
The MACAW (Make America Christian And White) Barrier
Trump’s Folly
Borderline Insanity
The Refundable Wall
Trump Baby Fence
.
Wall of America
Enchilada Encroachment Enclosure
Burrito Barrier
The Salsa Strainer
Trump’s Burrito Barricade
The Borderline
GREAT TRUMPTON
The Capsicum Divide
Trump’ov’Dwall
* The Flailing Wall
* Pricks & Mortar
* Pyre Wall
* Border Case
* Penis Enhancer
Since the path he is following, we predict the next step is to become a racist nation
Hence the Tagline- THE WHITE WALL- THAT SEPARATES THE BLACK
Trump Definition of Wall:
THE W.A.L.L- Wall Against Like & Love
WallyMcTrumpFace
(A tribute to BoatyMcBoatFace which was the most popular choice of name for a new Royal Navy (or some or other arm of the British state) boat quite recently. Sadly, however, this name was only given to the boat’s dinghy.)
After all my pharmaceutical experience, I am fairly confident that the correct term is the Blood-Brain Barrier. I have helpfully pasted the relevant description below:
‘The blood–brain barrier (BBB) is a semipermeable membrane barrier that separates the circulating blood from the brain extracellular fluid in the central nervous system (CNS). The blood–brain barrier is formed by brain endothelial cells, which are connected by tight junctions. The blood–brain barrier allows the passage of water, some gases, and lipid-soluble molecules by passive diffusion, as well as the selective transport of molecules such as glucose and amino acids that are crucial to neural function. Furthermore, it prevents the entry of lipophilic potential neurotoxins by way of an active transport mechanism mediated by P-glycoprotein. Astrocytes have been claimed to be necessary to create the blood–brain barrier. A few regions in the brain, including the circumventricular organs, do not have a blood–brain barrier.’
See? Absolutely no Mexicans will get past that,
The Borderline Disorder
I don’t know Spanish very well, but you have to take the audience into consideration. Here are a few ideas.
Los Muros Grande (The big wall? just has a nice ring to it, may be plural though)
El Grande Muros (The big wall)
La Loco Grande Muros (The Crazy Big Wall, we definitely got to get LOCO in there somehow)
Loco Grande Muros De Trump (crazy big wall of Trump, or Trump’s crazy big wall)
Muros De Estados Unidos (Wall of the United States)
Can a Spanish speaker help me out here to get the phrasing right?
1. IVANKA
2. THE GREATEST WALL
3. WALL YA LOOK AT THAT
4. WALL #1
5. TRUMPWALL: FUCK YEAH
“Wall american rejects”
Oh! you beautiful wall, You great big beautiful wall!
Tex v Mex
Trump’s Triumph
Cerveza no-go
Like nothing I’ve built before, folks
The Tacoblocker
The Big Chilly
The Great Wetback Barrier
The Hombrestopper
The Crooked Wallary
The Great Wall of Trump
The Tunnel Maker
The Muro Grande
My First Wall
By Donald Trump Age 7(0)
The IsUSlated Wall
– The Greatest Wall Ever Built by the Most Powerful Man™
– #TheWallofTolerance
– The Wall of Bad Hombres
– The Wall of Equality
– The Wall of Terror
Checkpoint Ése
The illegal immigrants wall
The antisocial wall
The Chasm
Crackpot Corridor
Meanwhile, the French are building a wall around the Eiffel Tower in a (probably hopeless) attempt to prevent a large number of dead Chinese tourists. So, in the interests of political balance I suggest:
Le Mur Eiffel
MurMur (in tribute to the French actress Miu Miu)
HighSIS
Alain Jumpe
Charles de Wall
La Reine Murgot (crikey my knowledge of French history/film is solid today…)
Spring Time For Mo
The Great Divide
Texas East German Heritage Monument
The Wall of Confusion.
The Great Wall of Gropers
Pence’s Fence
GREAT DIVERSION
THE DIVIDED WALL U.S.A
It Happened One Night
The Nation’s Overcompensation
MAGA Wall This is an acronym for Make America Great Again.
America’s CactusM
Previous entry should read
America’s Cactus
The ‘No bad hombres’ wall
The world’s largest horizontal Trump Tower.
TrumpGate.
The Whitewash Wall.
(and a wee slogan for good measure):
‘The Best Defence is a F*** Off Fence’
Wally McWallface
Call it: Trump Means Fart in England
WALLTER WHITE
ANTI-HOMBRE PROTECTION BARRIER
MEXICAN’T ENTER
Puerta
1. The Wall of Triumph
2. The Trump Wall
The Who’s Toupée? Wall
The We-ALL (to be intended in its whole spectrum of meanings)
The Bawl Wall
The Great I sued China to claim the name Wall
Trump’s Barrier
The Great Split
Trump’s Wall of Shame
Trump’s Blackball
The Freedom Wall
Knock Before Entering Wall
Throw Them Back Over Wall
Wall of Protection
Promise Delivered Wall
The Trump Lump
The pole-vaultable wall.
The Greatest Great Great Wall Wall
The Canvas
Fly Zone Wall
Labor-Less Wall
Wall-E
Waste Wall
Taco Taco